God, Michael Moore is such a partisan freak sometimes. Here are his “Five Ways the Democrats Can Avoid a Catastrophe and Pull Off the Mother of All Upsets”:
1. Immediate Wall-to-Wall TV Ads, Internet Videos, and Appearances Hammering Who the Hell Put Us in the Misery We’re In.
That would be George Bush and the Republicans…and Barack Obama and the Democrats. The Democrats, including Senator Obama, weren’t exactly shut out of Congress for the last six years or so. And if Obama and the Democratic Congress had focused on straightening out the economy instead of grandstanding on healthcare and paying off their union buddies in the auto and education industries, we’d probably be doing a lot better by now.
2. Indict the Criminals.
Announce that the Justice Department will seek indictments against both those who caused the economic collapse and those who became war profiteers. Call it for what it is: organized crime.
I agree in principle–although I don’t think very much of the economic collapse was due to out-and-out crime–but good luck with that. Your man Obama has adopted a let’s-not-dwell-on-the-past approach when dealing with crimes committed under the Bush administration. But that didn’t stop his Justice Department from indicting some guy who blew the whistle on the previous administration. Oh, no, wouldn’t want to encourage any more of that kind of thing.
3. Announce a Moratorium on All Family Home Foreclosures.
Eh. Losing your home has got to suck. A lot. But you know what else has got to suck? Wanting to buy a home and not being able to afford a nice one because thousands of homes are being held off the market by people who aren’t making payments on them.
I suspect there’s probably some sort of everybody-wins compromise here that no one in the government will ever consider. If we really aren’t going to let the perfectly legal foreclosures go through, maybe we could set up some kind of fast-track owner-to-renter transition. Ownership of the homes would transfer to whoever could afford to buy them at whatever the price the bank was willing to sell them, but the current occupants would get to stay for a while as renters for, say, three years. This would clear up the mortgage logjam and maybe shift housing prices down into reasonable territory while still limiting disruption to families.
I don’t know, that probably wouldn’t work, but there’s got to be something better than just robbing the banks.
4. Announce a New 21st Century WPA.
Oh God no. We don’t need more government employees.
“Who’s hiring? THE GOVERNMENT IS HIRING!” Put together a simple plan to hire enough people to repair our roads, fix up our aging schools, and rebuild our infrastructure. Fund this by taxing the richest 1% who have more financial wealth than 95% of Americans combined! Unemployment will drop to 5%.
Only if the Bureau of Labor Statistics is allowed to pull numbers out of their ass like Michael just did.
5. Declare That No Democrat Will Accept ANY Wall Street Money in the Next Election Cycle.
Pick a day in the coming week. Have all your fellow Democrats in Congress stand in front of the Capitol (with President Obama) and pledge that if America allows you to retain control of Congress, none of you will take a penny from Wall Street for the 2012 election. Instead, promise to accept donations of only $2, $5 and $10. You will also pledge not to take a job as a lobbyist or lawyer for ANY corporation for ten years after you leave Congress.
Expand that pledge to include unions and government agencies at all levels, and you just might have something, but…
The message will be a powerful one to the average American fed up with corrupt political hacks.
Oh, yes, Congress may be filled with corrupt political hacks, but I’m sure they’ll shape up if they just make a fucking pledge! This won’t do any good unless it has the power of law, and since Congress makes all the laws, even that won’t do any good.