The Amazingly prolific and talented James Lileks is now doing some audio productions of something he calls the Diner. Think of it as the musical version of his other cultural commentary.
His 3/4/2005 Diner is pretty good, but I have three gripes.
First, it’s a little insulting that he thinks his readers wouldn’t recognize the Terminator music. ‘Nuff said.
Second, the whole shooting business disturbs me. Oh, not because Lileks shot that guy. You walk into the Diner and pull something like that, and you ought to know there will be consequences. But that gunshot sound effect…just listen to it:
Where did he get that? It’s all wrong for the diner. Did he grab it out of some western movie? I can just hear the echo reverbating off the surrounding hills. Loaded into a sound editor, I can see the echo reverberating off the hills. (I’m just that kind of bear.)
If you want to sample gunshots, try a rap album. Here’s one from Eminem’s latest:
See what I mean? Less echo. Of course there’s still too much, because he’s shooting in a concert hall. Besides, Lileks doesn’t strike me as a fan of rap music. I think this is more his style, from the Greatest Noir Video Game Ever. I give you Max Payne’s Beretta:
That’s too flat, but it’s a lot easier to add echo than take it away.
Damn. I just replayed the Diner, and he said at the end he had a shotgun. Now I’m sounding like some crazed stalker who spent hours downloading sounds off the web for some hotshot writer he’s never met. I can stop anytime I want. Here’s Max’s shotgun:
Much better. Oh, what the hell, because it’s cool, here’s his Desert Eagle:
This brings me to my third gripe. How can Lileks mention the Diner and fire extinguishers and not include a reference to…well…here’s a hint, courtesy of an
Give up?
You know, I wrote all this in an email to Lileks, but then I realized it had grown into enough material for a blog post. So I did both.
I appreciate all the gunfire sounds you have collected. I will use them in future podcasts for segues…”And now…blam!”
I have a review of the Diner at http://beliefseekingunderstanding.patriotforum.org/archives/000772.html