Give me a moment; I’ll get to it. Trust me. And, since I’m a fiction writer, I’ll even make it all turn out well in the end, with lessons learned, a bond between police and citizens strengthened, and all that cool stuff. Hell, I’ll even tease a friend who will find this sooner or later, maybe embarrass the badgelickers who don’t see the difference between service-oriented policing and Bad Cop Stuff, and all that, although that would be a lot to ask.
It’ll be fun.
Start here, with Shane Becker getting rousted by a couple of Loomis ATM Ninjas (mainly the shaved-headed idiot, below) for the crime of photography, with some help from Officers Fife and Fife II of the much (and deservedly) maligned Seattle PD. I’ll wait.
You back? Good.
Since then, he says that he’s gotten all sorts of attention — fine — and been called a douchebag by badgelickers all across the globe for, apparently, not respecting the authoritah of various folks with badges and guns.
Yeah, he’s a douchebag, but not for that. Respect, after all, has to be earned, and none of the folks with badges in this earned any.
Let’s back up and start with a few basic principles of life: be polite by default — I’m not saying that you have to put up with a lot of bumptiousness from officious jerks without doing anything about it, honest; just do useful stuff, if you’re going to do anything, and we’ll get to that — and (I can’t believe I have to spell this out, but . . . ) if you’re threatened with bodily violence by a jerk with a gun, call the cops and let them — you can’t make them, but you can give them the opportunity — arrest him and introduce him to the more structured environment suitable to his special needs.
Anybody who doesn’t get both of those is a douchebag. So, yes, Shane Becker demonstrated that he doesn’t get the latter, and maybe — with some provocation — he missed out on the politeness stuff.
Okay. Now, let’s roll back the tape, a bit, and make the assumption that Shane Becker’s got both of those basics down, and — what the heck — let’s cut the Seattle PD just a bit of slack, for fun, and assume that Officers Debra Pelich, GE Abed, and Sergeant William Robertson are merely ignorant and mildly abusive, and not out to buy themselves all sorts of bad press and maybe worse if given an easy, obvious alternative from the very start. I’m not going to palm a card and make them great, mind you, but just decent, ordinary, service-oriented cops who got started off on the wrong path, and led themselves down it, so let’s make it easy for the poor dears to do it right, from the start, and see where it might go.
To review the bidding: Becker’s been minding his own business, standing in line at REI, after taking a few perfectly lawful photographs in a public place of something going on in said public place, and a shaved-head, bullet-headed uniformed ATM Ninja in a Loomis uniform with a big Glock on his hip in a fast-draw Serpa holster walks over and starts making impertinent demands.
ATM Ninja: When you’re done over here —
Not a bad way to phrase things, and a good start, actually.
— come talk to me.
ATM Ninja guy has forgotten the magic word: “Please.”Nothing wrong with asking a favor, after all.
Becker: No, thanks.
A polite response to an impertinent demand. Cool.
ATM Ninja: Don’t try to leave. I will tackle you.
And here’s where we go back to the basic principle, above, and what a non-douchebag should have done. In this variant, Becker whips out a cell phone and calls 911.
911: Seattle PD. What is your emergency?
Becker: I’m being held prisoner by a man with a gun at the REI. Please send help. He said he’s going to tackle me if I try to leave.
911: Police are on their way, sir. Please stay on the phone. Is he pointing a gun at you?
Becker: No, Ma’am. He’s off near the ATM with the other Loomis guy.
911: Loomis guy? These are security guards?
Becker: I think they’re Loomis security guards, servicing the ATM?
911: Where are you now, sir?
Becker: I’m in line over at the counter, and . . . here comes one of your officers.Debra Pelich: You called 911, sir?
Becker: I sure did, and —
ATM Ninja, running over: He was taking pictures of me!
Okay, we could go a lot of ways here. I’d really like to make Debra Pelich a good, knowledgeable, service-oriented cop, but I can’t get the knowledgeable stuff in, as she’s got that “photography is a crime” thing in her no-doubt sweet little head.
(Yes, Deb, I’m being deliberately condescending, here, and I’ve made it real easy for your google egoscan to find this. Tough. Redeem yourself in real life, and I’ll give you some respect, okay?)
But I do have a soft spot in my heart (and some would say my head) for cops, so in a moment I’m going let her take a deep breath, remember what she’s signed up to do, and have her and Abed be the good — albeit not perfect — service-oriented cops that I really wish I thought that they were, and which I know damn well they should aspire to be.
Debbie: You were taking pictures of him? That’s been illegal since 911?
Becker takes his own deep breath, and sighs: No, it isn’t illegal to take pictures of some Loomis guy. But, hey, I didn’t call you to talk about photography and 911. I called you because this guy said if I tried to leave he’d tackle me, and I’d really like to be able to go about my business.
Debbie: But you were taking pictures of him!
Becker takes another deep breath: Ma’am, I’m sorry, but I don’t want to discuss photography with you. If you’re going to arrest me for taking pictures, I won’t resist, but . . . okay, we’ll make it simple: I need to speak to my attorney before I talk to you any more. Am I free to leave?
Debbie: I [she takes a deep breath, herself, and lets it out] . . . okay. I think I got off on the wrong foot with you, sir. Hang on a moment, please, sir? Just as a favor?
A good, service-oriented cop knows he can start soft, as that gives him some place to go later. She didn’t do that, either in this fictional account or real life. She should have. (Hey, Chief. How’s the new gig? I knew you’d stumble across this, eventually. Yes, I was listening; no, I won’t embarrass you. Gimme a call sometime; let’s do lunch, on me.) Works for women, too.
Here, if he doesn’t want to play nice, she’s got other tools in her toolbox, but she doesn’t have to decide if she’s got the right or need to take them out if “please” or the old “as a favor” routine does everything she wants, and more.
Becker: A moment, sure.
Debbie, turning to the Loomis guy: You said you were going to tackle this citizen if he tried to leave, did you?
ATM Ninja: Yeah, but he was taking pictures of me, and you know that’s illegal, and —
Debbie, who has finally gotten it: Sir. I am a police officer. I can, under some circumstances, detain a citizen who wishes to go about his business without performing an arrest. You, sir, are not. You’re a guy with a badge and a gun, sir. Maybe it’s illegal for him to take your picture; maybe it isn’t. We’ll let the prosecutors sort that out. But are you telling me that you made a citizens arrest of this guy? If so, well, and I’m sorry, sir, but if he did, then I have to take you into custody — I got no choice. Then again, if it’s a false arrest —
ATM Ninja: False arrest? Who’s talking about an arrest? I just asked the guy to talk to me, and just wait minute, I —
Debbie: I’m speaking, sir. You’ll have your chance in a moment. [Turns to Becker] I’m sorry, sir; I didn’t introduce myself, before. I’m Officer Debra Pelich of the Seattle PD? May I have your name?
Becker: Shane Becker, Ma’am.
Debbie: May I see your ID, please, sir. One way or another, I’m going to need to see it for my report.
Becker: Here.
Debbie: You’re still at this address?
Beckier: I don’t know if —
Debbie: Please, Mr. Becker. You called me; I’m here to help. Really.
Becker: Well, sure, I guess it doesn’t hurt anything to tell you that. Yeah. I am.
Debbie, returning the ID: Thank you, Mr. Becker. [Turns back to the ATM Ninja] Now, if it turns out that you and I are right, and that photography’s a crime, we can get him picked up. Unless, of course, you’re telling me that you performed a citizens arrest? I’ll haul him in right now, and you and Loomis can try to justify it. Lotsa luck.
ATM Ninja: I, err….
Abed: I dunno, Deb. I don’t like security guards playing cop. You?
Debbie: Never cared for it, myself. And I don’t like guys with guns threatening bodily harm to the citizens we serve and protect.
Abed: I read somewhere that’s illegal.
Debbie: Yeah, me, too.
Abed: You want to let this slide, Mr. Becker? Technically, it’s our call, but . . .
Becker: I guess I can let that slide. But this photography stuff . . . ?
Debbie: Hey. Maybe I’m right, maybe I’m wrong. Does sound kinda strange that there’d be some law against taking a picture of a security guard, though. Let’s say we let the brass and the prosecutors sort it out. If I have to come out and arrest you, though, I’ll just be doing my job. Nothing personal, sir.
Abed: Yeah. Like that’s going to happen. Mr. Becker? You sure you don’t want us to arrest this guy? I mean, hey, I think he’s just a working guy who made a mistake, and . . .
Debbie: I think we’ve kept Mr. Becker long enough. You have a nice day, sir. And next time some jerk with a gun threatens you, you send for the Seattle PD again, please. Protect and serve, and all . . .
So, yeah. Shane Becker is a douchebag. But in this mess, he was the least douchie of the lot.
Do better next time, Deb. Really.
While engage in flights of fantasy, consider that in the scheme of people who real police officers love to hate, mall/ATM ninjas are always above kids. So while your “protect and serve” approach is well intended, you must remember to whom that applies first. After all, ninjas are still cool.
I am appalled by cops who don’t seem to know squat about some of the most basic rights of citizens. I’m not talking about cops who know better, but choose to do wrong–plenty of those. I’m talking about cops who just don’t get it. In this day and age, when cameras are everywhere, it is inexcusable that any department fails to make it crystal clear to every police officer: citizens are permitted to photograph you, or anyone else, or anything else in public places. Do not tell them to stop taking photos, do not threaten them, do not touch them and do not touch their cameras. Here’s what your attitude should be: police officers are to protect the right of citizens to take photographs in public places. If anyone interferes with that right, you should arrest that person.
Scott — hey, writing flights of fantasy is kinda my job description. And I said, upfront, that I expect some people would think me soft in the head, and while I didn’t name you . . .
I do know a fair number of cops. I’d suspect that the ATM ninjas would rank above the Paul Blarts, as the ATM ninjas wear guns, and for cops, that’s kind of significant — and that would be moreso where you live than it is where I do, for the obvious reasons.
Badged security guards who don’t carry the boomsticks? Many cops (and some noncops, like, well, me) think there’s something absurd about somebody who is supposed to protect people and can’t, say, shoot the (perhaps not overly common) machete-wielding maniac who is trying to chop people up at the moment is kind of strange. And it gets stranger out here in Scandasota, where pretty much any nonfelon over twenty-one who wants to legally carry a gun can arrange to do that . . . except the guys in the cop-like uniforms. Bizarre.
Kids? I’ve probably seen the same Youtube videos you have and heard some (fewer, given our relative gigs) of the horror stories, and, yup, there are lots of cops who utterly despise kids, particularly the sort of mouthy teenagers who think the world owes them a living and deference to their protected life experiences. (I been that kid, and I got one like that, who I’m kind of fond of.)
But there’s also guys like Joe Roman — I’ve posted about him at SJ — and at least some (I’d guess most) of the older cops working shifts at the Mall of America (they’re Bloomington PD, and while it’s not a great department, it’s not all that bad) who clearly like kids, generally, and even put up with the mouthy ones, and really get that their job is that whole protect and serve thing.
You want to tell me that it’s far too rare, I’ll agree. A flight of fantasy, as in doesn’t happen, like every? Nah.
Dr. X: I’m appalled, too. The world’s gone crazy on the issue of photography, and there’s a whole bunch of Barney Fife types who are wilfully and repeatedly ignorant. Some of the usual gun owner civil rights crowd — the GOCRA bunch, up in Minnesota, who remember what the C and R are for — are working on that. More on that another time.
Your scenario is definitely preferable to what actually happened, but to be honest, it’s laughably implausible. I know you’re a fiction writer, but if a novel or short story featured a situation in which a 20-30 year old man was threatened by a security guard ten feet away, and reacted by calmly and casually calling 911, then I’d have some difficulty suspending my disbelief. It might be how Mary Sue would react, but it’s not how I’d see any actual human being acting on a spur of the moment.
Also, your link to his blog is broken.
Good point. Well, when writing fiction, one is restricted by plausibilities, so if this fiction didn’t work for you, I failed. Sorry.
In real life, yes, just that sort of thing has happened. In the one situation I’m pretty familiar with, no, it wasn’t a 20-30 year old man, but a seventeen-year-old kid, and the issue wasn’t whether or not she could take pictures, but could mouth off to some adult (she shouldn’t have; it was rude), but whether the adult (an armed security guard) was allowed to run his mouth off and make threats that he probably didn’t mean, and certainly shouldn’t have said, and no, he wasn’t. (And no, it wasn’t my kid.)
So, yes, such things happen. I can — honest — understand that an anarchist doesn’t think about calling the authorities, but, hey, he doesn’t get to skip paying his taxes or being governed by the same authorities the rest of us do, so it only seems reasonable to me for him to avail himself of their services, when appropriate. I’ve never been one of those “if you don’t like cops, the next time you’re mugged, call a hippie | CDL | emo kid | Second Amendment activist | anarchist” types.
I’ll fix the link, if the boss doesn’t get to it before me.
It sounds to me like they’re all a bunch of dicks. The rent-a-cops, the Seattle PD, and the ipod-wielding, thule-loving pseudo-anarchist. It’s obvious the kid suffers from feelings of powerlessness and doesn’t like the security dicks telling him what to do, so he snub’s them by not complying. The rent-a-cops get all bent out of shape, realizing that maybe they don’t have as much authority as they thought they had. They’re not going to let the skinny geek with the earplugs and the trust fund get away with this so they call the police. Now they feel they’ve got a bit of power back and they’re thinking we’ll see whose boss here. They arrest the kid, violate his civil liberties and in the end look like a bunch of jackasses. What a mess. If the kid is smart, he’ll take Ron Kuby’s offer and sue the lot of them. In the meantime, Loomis and REI’s PR people are scrambling, trying to figure out how best to avoid the bad publicity, telling the news outlets that the kid can come back into their store. What a joke.
Ron Kuby’s stepped up? Cool.
All that and you got a measly 7 fucking comments? You have way too much time on your hands…
Debbie: You were taking pictures of him? That’s been illegal since 911?
“Please call your lieutenant and ask for an explanation of the laws about taking photographs. I’m still on the line to 911 and this is all being recorded.”
Spare me…The little boy Shane was being deliberately provocative to evoke a reaction from the guards.